A Lot of Time These Days…At Night.

I got this title from Meg M.  a friend of mine I met a month or 2 back…on Facebook of all places.  I thought it sounded like a Beatles song…and it made me laugh.

We were talking about how much time I spend doing things like this…writing a blog…creating different websites just for the hell of it…destroying the first blog so I could make another one…and so on.  I do these things at night because a cancer deal takes a pretty big bite out of your social life.  (Truth be told…I’m not chasing the A-list right now anyway.  That’s a job in itself!)

I thought I was just filling time…trying to occupy my brain so it didn’t fixate on the sad parts of our situation.  (And by that I mean to quit feeling so damn sorry for myself.)  But I learned another lesson from it…and here it is:

Lesson:  To move forward when things are going well is a good thing.  To do the same when the bottom falls out…even though you’re not sure why you’re doing it…is a better thing.

About 2 years ago I read Victor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning and decided that the best way to get through our new way of life was to try and find meaning in it.  That’s pretty much how Thirty Seconds was born.  Could I find lessons in all this and pass them on to people who stumbled across my posts?  So far I see that I can.  But there’s more…

More than meets the eye… 

Now I see that learning lessons and giving them clarity through writing is only part of this insane ride.  There is another more energetic purpose for spilling your guts out in cyberland:  to create.

Helen another FB friend of mine and awesom blogger recommended I read Conversations with God : An Uncommon Dialogue (Book 1).  (BTW…it is now my favorite book.  Sorry, Herr Frankl…)  It is blowing me away on several levels…but last night I read this quote and it applies to all of us in blog-land:

The point of life is therefore to create-who and what you are, and then experience that.

The time I have these days at night is not the prison I once thought it was.  Tonight…like last night…I realize that I am creating something.  If I believe that quote from God then I am experiencing no less than the point of living.  (Seriously…how bad ass is it to have a quote from The Big Man Himself on your blog?)

I didn’t know what I was doing when I jumped into this blogging thing…I just know I needed to be doing something.  I was creating…and continue to create with each post.  

Another Lesson:  It doesn’t matter whether we write, knit, belly dance, cook, paint, or jump around in a frog suit just for the hell of it.  We leave behind something that didn’t exist before we did those things…and by doing so…we create our life.

[NOTE:   Watching your wife go through the things that I see is NOT a gift…it sucks…completely.  Don’t for one minute think that I am saying how wonderful it all is that I have discovered the gift of creation in all this.  F*ck that.  I’d go back to chasing the A-list in a heart beat…but those thoughts are as useful to me as a hair brush.]

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Published in: on June 4, 2009 at 4:32 pm  Comments (6)  
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6 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. to the point, struck a chord, and strangely enough, or maybe not, I was thinking very similar thoughts last night, about my time, at night. You ARE creating, and I am blessed to be able to participate in your journey. Namaste

    • Again…thanks, Meg. I’m glad you like my posts. This one was a bit long…but I did it on the fly. You’ll always know when I don’t edit if you visit here often. Those posts will be very, very long.

      Be that as it may…thank you. (Especially for the title. I still think that’s genius…)

  2. Love everything you write-because it comes from your heart and your own experience. The simple clarity and directness of your words all ring so true. Life has put you in a situation of sad experience and deep reflection. In spite of yourself, you are making the most of it.

    • Thank you. I consider that some pretty high praise…I visit your blog and it’s right up there.

      Again…thanks.

      A

  3. Well put, Andy. I love the way you write.

    Writing/dancing/art/photography/whatever form of creation, enables us to recycle whatever life hands us and thus creates new life…

    • I think that must be true, Agnes. Feels like it anyway…and now I have you to back me up. Thanks for visiting…

      A


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